How to use this guide
- Seven weeks, one chapter a week. The chapters are short, so couples can read at home or aloud together at the start of the meeting.
- About an hour. Ten minutes to catch up, ten to read or recap the chapter, thirty to talk, ten to pray.
- Couples answer together first. Give each couple a few minutes to talk privately before sharing with the group. Nobody has to share anything they’d rather keep between the two of them.
- Use the book’s own questions and prayer too. Every chapter ends with questions to think over and a prayer. This guide adds a few more for group discussion.
For leaders: keep it light. Judith’s whole point is that hard days come to everybody, and a little laughter helps. If someone shares something heavy, pray for them and follow up privately.
Week 1: Don't Settle
Chapter 1
- What did you each hope for in a husband or wife before you met?
- What does “settling” look like, and why do people do it?
- What qualities matter most to you now, years later?
- If you’re single or dating: what are you willing to wait for?
Week 2: Stay Humble
Chapter 2
- When is it hardest for you to say “I was wrong”?
- How has pride caused trouble in a relationship you’ve seen?
- What would it look like to put your spouse first this week?
Week 3: 100/100
Chapter 3
- What’s the difference between 50/50 and 100/100?
- Where do you tend to keep score in your marriage?
- Name one thing you could give fully this week without expecting anything back.
Week 4: Best Friends or Worst Enemies
Chapter 4
- What made you friends in the first place?
- How do you treat your spouse differently from your best friend, and why?
- What’s one habit that would make you better friends?
Week 5: True Happiness
Chapter 5
- Where do you look for happiness when things are hard?
- What has brought you real, lasting joy as a couple?
- How does your faith shape what you expect from marriage?
Week 6: The Little Things
Chapter 6
- What small thing does your spouse do that means a lot to you?
- Which little kindnesses have slipped over the years?
- Pick one small thing to do every day this week.
Week 7: Legacy
Chapter 7
- What did your parents’ marriage teach you, good or bad?
- What do you want your children or grandchildren to learn from yours?
- If someone described your marriage in one sentence, what would you want them to say?
A closing prayer for your group
Lord, thank You for every couple here. When the hard days come, help us hold on to each other and to You. Teach us to be humble, to give everything, and to stay best friends. Let our marriages be a legacy that points our families to You. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow.Ecclesiastes 4:9–10 (KJV)
Ordering books for your group
Each couple will want a copy. The book is on Amazon in paperback, hardcover, ebook and audiobook. Planning a larger church order? Email affluencyllc@gmail.com.